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  • John C. Whitbeck, Jr.


    John C. Whitbeck, Jr. practices in the following areas of law: Family Law, Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support, Visitation Rights, Adoptions, Spousal Support, Mediation, Arbitration, Relocation Cases, Domestic Violence, Criminal Law, DUI/DWI, Reckless Driving, All Felonies, All Misdemeanors, Juvenile Crimes, Mental Health Law, Civil and Business Litigation, Construction Litigation, Education Law, Election Law, Debt Collection, Consumer and Lemon Law.

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  • Ruth M. McElroy


    Ruth M. McElroy practices in the following areas of law: Family law, Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support, Visitation Rights, Adoptions, Spousal Support, Relocation Cases, Pre and Post Marital Agreements, Domestic Violence, Reckless Driving, DUI/DWI, Juvenile Crimes, Felony and Misdemeanor Crimes, Traffic Offenses, Debt Collection, Civil and Business Litigation. She serves the Virginia Court system as a Guardian ad litem.

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  • Jennifer D. Cisneros


    Jennifer D. Cisneros practices in the following areas of law: Family law, Divorce, Child Custody, Child Support, Visitation Rights, Adoptions, Spousal Support, Relocation Cases, Domestic Violence, Juvenile Crimes, Reckless Driving, DUI/DWI, Estate Planning, Wills and Probate, Trusts, Civil and Business Litigation and Debt Collection.

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Rebuilding Your Independence and Social Life After a Divorce


A divorce can feel cataclysmic, particularly when it comes as a surprise. One day your life revolves around your spouse and marriage. The next, you are back on your own. This change can cause your friends to drift away from you, particularly when a couple was friends with both you and your spouse. Some friends will specifically choose your spouse over you. In certain circumstances, you may find yourself isolated after neglecting your friendships during your marriage. Now, you are faced with the prospect of creating a new life and rebuilding your social network.

Tips to Rebuild Your Independence and Social Life

After your divorce is underway or finalized, you are going to need to put some thought into what you want for yourself and your life moving forward. This is your moment to start over and build better relationships than before. To do this, consider the following tips:

  • Let yourself grieve the end of your marriage: The truth is that you probably will not be ready to get out there and make new friends and romantic partners right away. That is OK. You need to give yourself time to grieve the end of your marriage. Your relationship was meaningful and it has come to an end. You need to come to terms with this and how it has changed you. Do not feel rushed to “get over it,” however be careful to notice when you are dwelling and push forward.
  • Concentrate on your health: Difficult marriages and stressful divorces often lead to unhealthy habits – physically or psychologically. Now that you are independent, take a moment to concentrate on your emotional and physical health. You may want to eat better, exercise more, and improve your self-care routine. Joining a gym, yoga studio, meditation group, or casual sports team can also help you meet new people.
  • Consider counseling: Whether or not you have ever seen a therapist or joined a support group before, consider it now. It is nearly impossible for a divorce to not stir up a pot of complicated and mixed emotions. Seeing a therapist in private or joining a divorce support group gives you an outlet and support network that can be crucial to helping you move forward. A support group can also be a great place to meet new friends.
  • Figure out what you like to do: Now that you are single, your hobbies and activities should center around what you truly enjoy doing. You may know what you love off the top of your head. However, this may also be a difficult question. That is OK. It gives you room to explore. Try out different clubs and activities. It is a great way to meet new people, find what you like, and build a healthy life.
  • Build your confidence: An unhappy marriage or divorce can knock your self-confidence down a peg. Use your time after a divorce to learn who you are, your unique qualities, and how to love yourself. It may sound corny, but proactively building your confidence can help you make new friends and date.
  • Do not expect too much from dating: After you have had time to grieve and rebuild your social life, try your hand at dating. However, do not expect the perfect new relationship right away. Modern dating, particularly online, can feel time-consuming and disheartening. However, it can be worth it.

Do You Need Advice About Divorce?

If you are considering divorce or your spouse has asked for one, call us at Whitbeck Cisneros McElroy PC in Leesburg at 703-997-4982. We can help you through this process by handling the legal aspects and providing emotional support.

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Governor Northam’s Executive Order 53 provides that businesses that offer professional rather than retail services may remain open. Our firm is continuing to operate to ensure you and your family have advocates available for whatever legal issue you face. For clients who prefer, we can arrange meeting by Zoom or other video-conferencing. We are also implementing internal procedures to provide a safe environment in the office. Please contact us at 703-777-1795 or schedule an appointment today!